I have a better appreciation for celebrities (such as Julia Roberts) who are followed everywhere, with everyone watching them. Being a Bature (white person) instantly puts me in this category. There are always eyes following me: people watching to see my reaction to things, what I am buying, how I am worshipping God, etc. Even I do a double take when I see a Bature, as there are so few of us around!
It is tempting to become quite tired of all the attention, and even more so to sometimes want to turn around and stare at them right back. ? It helps to say to myself “Pretend you are Gwyneth Paltrow and smile!”. Seriously, the attention should not be on Erin, but on God and how He shines through me. It definitely provides accountability and opportunities to show kindness, patience and love…which is witnessed by many, who assume that because I am white, I am a missionary. 
This is a journal entry I wrote last month about this:
“I continually deal with the stressor of always being watched, of people asking me for help, money, medicine, etc. Jesus lived this way: always being watched, under scrutiny, people begging for his help. Matthew 15:23+ says that ‘great crowds’ came to You. You did not turn them away. Instead, You healed them “and they praised the God of Israel.” You called to Your disciples and said “I have compassion for these people. They have been with me for three days.” I can’t imagine that You rolled Your eyes, or became impatient with these people who did not leave your side for three days. You were 100% human, but even when You were physically tired, You were available. Jesus, help me to be like You.”
Pray that all of the attention received will turn the spotlight onto God.
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