Kingdom

Back in December I was having dinner with a friend and we were talking about the new year that was around the corner. She mentioned that for a few years she has picked a word to focus on for the whole year. The word guided her thoughts and her prayers, her readings and her conversations. One year she chose a word that she needed to work on, like 'patience'. The next year she chose an attribute of God's character, such as 'Provider'. I thought it was a great concept, but, like I do too many times, I forgot about it. (maybe my word should be 'Remember'.)

Then last week I was listening to the radio and a pastor was talking about the very same approach. He started doing this 5 years ago. He then encouraged his congregation to all have a word to focus on and learn to live by. He can immediately associate a word to a year. Like, 2005 = freedom because he can testify to all the lessons and ways he learned about living in freedom. After listening to him share, I could really understand the benefits to having a word.

I immediately knew what my word for 2011 is - Kingdom.

I had already been contemplating this word for about a month. One day in December, God brought a hurting young lady to my office at church. Whenever I counsel/sit with someone in a lot of pain and in need of a lot of wisdom, I constantly pray as she talks so that I will know how each of my responses should be. Many times I am being taught while sharing with someone. I love how God does that.

I told her we have a choice. We can either choose to build our own kingdom or we can choose to build God's kingdom. 

Erin's Kingdom - I want everything to worship me and to revolve around me. If something inconveniences me or gets in my way, I get irritated or honk my horn. How dare they? Don't they know who I am? If someone says something mean to me or ignores me, I shoot back a reply or sulk. Don't they know who I am? If a friend doesn't follow through or doesn't make the effort to spend time with me, I pull back or put up walls. Don't they know who I am?

God's Kingdom - Everything in my life worships Him and revolves around Him. If He asks, I will go. If He interrupts, I will listen. He is I AM. If He allows pain from others, I will look to Him. He is I AM. If He takes me to a place of loneliness and dependency, I will run to Him. He is I AM.

In God's Kingdom, everything in my life is to deflect off of Erin and onto I AM. Erin is just flesh and bones and blood. Erin is nothing. I AM is Creator God, King of Kings and Lord of Lords. Erin is foolish and selfish. I AM is the Author of wisdom and of love. Erin can't see past what is in front of her. I AM has already written the book of my life before one sentence came to be. Erin depends on others to bring validity and acceptance. I AM gives Erin validity and acceptance.

Now why would I ever want anyone to worship a being so limited, so self-serving, so near sighted as Erin? Why would I insist on building my own kingdom and achieving my own goals, while living where I want and spending 'my' money the way I want? Why do I believe I have certain rights and when those don't get fulfilled, I get in a tizzy? Why do I seek to have power to choose whom I love and whom I dismiss from my kingdom?  "If you love only those who love you, what good is that?" - Jesus.

"But seek first His kingdom and His righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." - Jesus.

"I AM that I AM." Exodus 3:14 

Kingdom.  Not mine, His. 2011 is the year where God will drive this point into my being, my bone and marrow, again and again and again. It is not about me. It is all about Him.


"All flesh is like grass and all its glory like the flower of grass. The grass withers, and the flower falls, but the word of the Lord remains forever." 1 Peter 1:24-25




 (see this link for more 'I am's http://www.bukisa.com/articles/270791_the-i-ams-of-god)