Today I called a driver a certain something when he almost ran me off the road. (Not a great word to be saying as I would go to Jesus' arms, so I am glad that wasn't the last word of my life.)
Tonight I was angry, bitter, and jealous all at the same time. And that was right after I prayed to be free from the anger, bitterness and jealousy.
This is what goes on in my mind:
I'm pretty. I'm ugly. I'm popular. No one likes me. I'm successful. I'm a failure. I'm godly. I'm hopeless. I'm encouraging. People hate a suck-up. People look up to me. People are tired of me. I'm creative. I'm manipulative. I'm wise. Stupid! I'm full of faith. I'm full of something else. I'm a leader. I grovel for attention. I'm accepted. Rejected! I have so many great friends. I'm alone. I'm a hard worker. Can I be any more lazy? I'm an excellent nurse. Who would want to hire me? The kids in Nigeria miss me like crazy. Auntie Erin, who? I have a way with words. Shut my mouth and give them a break. They're blessed to know me. They are tired of me. I'm a great communicator. I have an ugly voice. I'm a great friend. Then why aren't I a better friend? I am strong. What a wimp. I hear God's voice. What a joke! I make a difference. I'm wasting my breath. I'm getting healthier. I'm afraid of sickness. I have a servant's heart. They don't want my help. I'm so forgiving. What a pushover! I have healthy boundaries. Don't be so rigid.
I am forgiven. Condemnation screams. I am accepted. Rejection mimics. I am free. Cell door locks.
And then....
In the prison I walked right into...
With the guilty sentence I accepted...
Slumped on the floor of the cell in defeat...
He speaks.
Yes, you lusted. But you quickly recognized it, asked for forgiveness, and redirected your thoughts.
Yes, you cussed. So, train your mouth to not cuss again by having My word on your tongue and in your heart.
Yes, you were angry, bitter and jealous. Yes, you harbored those thoughts for even a minute too long. But, you saw it for what it was. A cheap shot by a weak enemy. And you battled against those thoughts with Truth. And you were victorious.
I don't see sin when I look at you. I see purity. I see righteousness. I see love.
I see my Son.
He died for you so that you can stay out of prison. So that you won't accept the guilty sentence that the enemy of your soul taunts you with. When you accepted Him as your Savior from your sins, that is exactly what He became. Your Savior. He saved you. He took the guilt, the prison sentence, the slow death of sin.
My Son, Jesus, He died. But, He came back to life! He is now with Me and talks to Me about you and intercedes on your behalf. My Spirit is in you to share My heart with you. Listen to My voice. Listen to the Truth of who you are and Who you belong to.
Child, I rejoice over you. I am giddy at the thought of you. I desire your attention. You are My creation, the art of My hands, the beauty of My thoughts, the adoration of My affections.
Stand up. Look forward. Shoulders back. Head held high.
And walk right out of that prison.
